Monday, December 31, 2012

2013 Resolution: Overachievers not-so-anonymous

Last year I jumped on the idea of a one word New Year's resolution. I'm happy to report this is the first time ever that I've actually stuck to my resolution for the entire year. No griping, no forgetting about it after two weeks, no feeling that I was roping myself into some unrealistic goal. No sir, it worked, and I feel so much better for it. Last year's word was: Less.

This year: Me.

Yep, a very small word, yet a very big aspiration.

This is my last year volunteering at my daughter's elementary school. After nine long years of PTO duties, I'm soooooo ready to hang up my dinged up, paint-covered name tag. My big Christmas craft project is done for the year so it's all downhill from here. This means that after June, that's a lot less obligations and stress for me.

I've been on a grant review board for the past couple years, and while I've enjoyed doing it, the one night the six meetings a year are on is the same night I have two other obligations. I enjoy the other two things more, and one of those is only for a month out of the year. This one is still up for debate, but I'm seriously considering stepping down as part of the reducing stress for me effort.

This past year, I've all but handed over my writing time to the drool-sucking monster of work. NaNo helped me find that time again, but not the creativity and inspiration that actually makes it enjoyable and readable. It's time to put an end to feeling like I need to work twelve hour days, day after day after day. Sure there will be some, but I've got to turn off work and make more time for me to do what I enjoy.

My kids are ten and fourteen, they don't need me every second of every day anymore. I need to step back with the small things and continue to hold them accountable for the things I expect them to do and find a few more things they can help out with. It's easy to just keep doing most things myself, but I could be delegating more. They're old enough to help spread the load to help reduce my overwhelming list of things I try to squeeze into every day.

Possibly most important, I will make time for me to eat lunch and breakfast. I can't tell you how many days I went without one or both this past year because there was just too much to get done every day.

I'm not sure when or how I became an overachiever, but it sure seems to take a while to recover from being one. After realizing how thin I've spread myself, I can't say it's hard to step down from everything I've roped myself into, but I do feel guilty knowing that those things might not get done by someone else. Sometimes, they just don't. I've seen it happen and I cringe. But I don't leap back into the fire. I'm not a superwoman with endless energy. I'm just me and there's only so much I can do. I have another resolution to stick to and I'd love to report another successful year. Wish me luck.


8 comments:

  1. Love the idea of a one word resolution. And your choice of Me really has me thinking.

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    1. Thanks for stopping by. I wish you luck with finding your one word.

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  2. When I read "one word resolution" I thought "Write".

    Well that's what mine is. I'd like to write despite my studies. Maybe it means writing a chapter over the weekend. Hopefully not. But Aundes Aura has taken me far too many years for my liking. I can't expect to make money at that rate. I'm here this year to increase my productivity and thus set myself up to write full-time as soon as possible!

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    1. I've tried that word - not with this method, but in general. ;) I did help me finish a novel (not that I've got that one published, but it is done) and get my first short story published, so may you have the same or better fortune. :)

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  3. Sounds like a few threads of that buried Superwoman cape must still be clinging to you somewhere. Sneaky stuff, Superwoman cape material :)

    After all you've done over the years, you deserve a "me" year. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise, and don't feel selfish about it either.

    My kids are in between yours (11 and 13) and we're trying to get them to help out more, too. Let me know how you get on - and if you find any tactics that actually work :)

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    1. I'm doing my best to run that cape through the shredder. For the most part, its only a few tatters left but work hit my 'free time' hard this year and added a whole new level of obligation so that's what I'm focusing more on this time around.

      I've got the kids doing their own laundry - which helps a lot. It's just the whole finding other things they can help with - including helping with work. Since I do that at home, that's also an option and they can always use a little extra money. ;)

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  4. I so related to this. I get all excited about these things I'm going to do and then suddenly I'm up at 2:00 a.m. trying to finish something, thinking, "Why do I do this to myself?"

    I'm also on a board of directors that I've been on for six years. Just as I was thinking of quitting, they asked me to chair and I idiotically said yes. Thankfully I came to my senses in time, and have told them I'll be leaving in April.

    Maybe my word for this year should be "less"!

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    1. I highly recommend 'less' for those like us. Good for you with the quitting. It's hard to not say yes, but sometimes it's just plain necessary for our own wellbeing.

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