Wednesday, April 6, 2016

IWSG and A to Z: Short Beginnings E

2016 THEME: Short Stories - at least the beginnings thereof.
YOUR PART: Throw out names, themes, random words or situations using the letter of the day and I'll pick some of them to include in the opening paragraphs of a short story.
WHY: I'm most inspired when there's a challenge involved. Usually that means an opening line or a theme. This month: your words.

My creative blender awaits your E word suggestions in the comments section. Stop by tomorrow's post to read the story you inspired.

Looking for more great blogs? Check out the massive list of A to Z Challenge participants.

D story:
Darcy sipped her dandelion tea and fought to keep a straight face as Nathan continued his rant.
"What if I wanted to marry Dukes?"
Tea nearly shot from her nose. Darcy coughed until she had things set back to rights and set her tea aside before it happened again. "Look, I understand you have tastes that most might call odd, but really, Nathan, your dog?"
"I'm not saying I do want to, but if I did, I'd have to move to a different state. The damn churches control the entire government around here and they smile and call it democracy. They claim that everything they do is for our own good, that they're taking care of us. I want choices."
"So disestablishmentarianism?"
"Exactly, I knew you'd understand."
"And you plan to find that where? Because I doubt anyone is going to allow you to marry your dog."

Wow, another month has passed. It's been a productive month at least. I managed to wrap up the first draft of Bound In Blue in time to have a couple days before April to play with edits on Sipper, a sci-fi short story

Which brings me to the conundrum of the month. I ran Sipper though my usual critique process and got good feedback. Edits were made and the story was sent out into submissions. The editorial feedback I've received along the way indicated issues with the flippant and snarky main character. So I tamed her down a little and sent the story back out.

Then comes the feedback that pointed out at major logic hole. It was a severe headdesk moment on my part. How had not only I missed this, bit the whole critique gang had also overlooked it? No idea.

A third of the way into a major rewrite, I read through the feedback again and realized a major issue that negated all the work I'd just done. Yes, there was a detail that desperately needed to be fixed, but the whole reveal at the end hadn't worked for this particular person. As in, they totally missed it, and the majority of the rest of the feedback beyond the logic problem was worthless because it was all answered in the reveal. The reveal had worked for everyone else.

Ah feedback, it can be frustrating and confounding. And this is why we all need many sets of eyes so that when one misses something, hopefully another will catch it, or go about reading it differently so that issues come to light before it burns through half my usual submission list. But even the best of systems occasionally fails and then, well, after recovering from the headdesk forehead bruises, we have to take a deep breath, edit yet again, and send that sucker back out there until it finds a home.

Tuesday, April 5, 2016

A to Z: Short Beginnings D

2016 THEME: Short Stories - at least the beginnings thereof.
YOUR PART: Throw out names, themes, random words or situations using the letter of the day and I'll pick some of them to include in the opening paragraphs of a short story.
WHY: I'm most inspired when there's a challenge involved. Usually that means an opening line or a theme. This month: your words.

My creative blender awaits your D word suggestions in the comments section. Stop by tomorrow's post to read the story you inspired.

Looking for more great blogs? Check out the massive list of A to Z Challenge participants.

C story:

Cornered, Janice cowered, praying anything in the world would rescue her from her mother's wrath.
"What were you thinking?" Her mother towered over her, hands on her hips, lips in a scowl that made Janice's stomach twist up in knots.
"I thought it would make it taste better," she whispered.
"Celery? You idiot girl. You do not put celery in Corned beef and Cabbage!"
Janice tried to disappear into the shadows and dust. Her mother had that crazy look in her eyes. The one that she'd had before the dog had vanished, before her father had left months before. He'd never come back either. Her mother had claimed that he'd run off with some other woman, that'd he'd deserted them. But Janice hardly blamed him. If she was old enough to survive on her own, she would have run off too.

Monday, April 4, 2016

A to Z: Short Beginnings C

2016 THEME: Short Stories - at least the beginnings thereof.
YOUR PART: Throw out names, themes, random words or situations using the letter of the day and I'll pick some of them to include in the opening paragraphs of a short story.
WHY: I'm most inspired when there's a challenge involved. Usually that means an opening line or a theme. This month: your words.

My creative blender awaits your C word suggestions in the comments section. Stop by tomorrow's post to read the story you inspired.

Looking for more great blogs? Check out the massive list of A to Z Challenge participants.

B Story...
Upon first copying the words I'd been given into my blank document, I had in mind to write a cute little story about a beagle and a bumblebee. Then I got pulled away from my computer and didn't end up writing the story until Sunday morning. So, uh, yeah...it appears the story veered in an entirely different direction.


Barry Beagle sped down the highway, the traffic blurring beside him as he zigzagged through the lanes. His phone buzzed on the plastic console somewhere under the pile of wadded up fast food wrappers like a bumblebee that wouldn't go away. Knowing it was his boss, because no one else ever bothered to call him, he blindly fished through the garbage and located the phone.

"Your delay in arriving to work is aggravating."

"Good morning to you too, you bombastic ass," he muttered under his breath. Barry switched the phone to speaker and dropped it on his lap so he could pay attention to the road. "I'll be there in three minutes."

"You better be, or consider yourself fired."

Literally, he was sure. Beelzebub loved fire.  

Barry ended the call and concentrated on weaving through traffic at his current blazing speed. Other drivers swore at him, gave him the finger, flashed their lights and honked their horns. Barry laughed at them all.

Then he spotted it, the gas truck, it's bulbous chrome tank gleaming in the morning sun. He punched the gas, the laughter bubbling up from deep inside until tears ran down his cheeks. The boss was going to love this.

The tanker truck was straight ahead. Barry tapped the back end of the single car between him and his goal. The car went spinning off to the left. The screams of the passengers as they slammed into the car in the next lane filled him with glee.

With the gas pedal to the floor, he aimed for the back of the truck. The boss would do the rest. Barry held his arms out wide as the car slammed into the tanker, propelling onto its side as it jackknifed into the heavy traffic of the morning rush on the highway. The glorious fumes tickled his nostrils as the fuel gushed from the punctured tank. And then the spark of his own car exploding ignited it all.

Barry extracted himself from the wreckage. His clothes had burned away, allowing his wings the freedom to unfurl and his long forked tail room to lash from side to side as he walked through the flames. From the sheer number if blacked souls snaking about in the chaos he'd created, he was sure he wasn't in trouble for being late. In fact, he considered as the boss summoned him back to hell, he might even get a promotion.



Saturday, April 2, 2016

A to Z: Short Beginnings B

2016 THEME: Short Stories - at least the beginnings thereof.
YOUR PART: Throw out names, themes, random words or situations using the letter of the day and I'll pick some of them to include in the opening paragraphs of a short story.
WHY: I'm most inspired when there's a challenge involved. Usually that means an opening line or a theme. This month: your words.

My creative blender awaits your B word suggestions in the comments section. Stop by tomorrow's post to read the story you inspired.

Looking for more great blogs? Check out the massive list of A to Z Challenge participants.

** Thank you to everyone who stopped by with suggestions yesterday. If I didn't get to your blog, I will. Unfortunately, during a dinner preparation mishap last night, I sliced off the tip of my right index finger. As you may imagine, this has slowed my typing considerably (and I'm supposed to be keeping it elevated. oops) and is now making much of what I normally cram into a day, take much longer. **

And now... the beginning of A story.

Adam threw his apple across the room, pegging Angelina right in the forehead. He ducked down behind his friends, hoping she hadn't seen him. The apple was suppose to have hit Jim, but he'd seen it coming and had ducked.  If Angelina told the teacher, he'd get in trouble. Again. He was always getting into trouble.

Mrs. Keebler wasn't in the room, which was most auspicious. He'd had enough of that old wrinklebag's perpetually angry face. She was probably down in the teacher's lounge eating some gluten, sugar, carb and calorie free snack,  or whatever it was that made her breath so bad.   

 In the teacher's absence, it seemed the Angelina was going to take matters into her own hands. Those hands were currently balled into fists at the end of the arms pumping at her sides as she marched over to him. Her aquamarine dress fluttered around her knees and then stilled like a sail that had lost its wind.

 Adam sunk into the chair beside Charlie. Unfortunately, even Charlie's aquiline nose couldn't hide him from her glare.

 "I'll be amazed if you can get out of detention this time. Yeah, that's right, I'm telling and there's nothing you can do about it jerkface."

 He knew he should be worried, that he should be defending himself, or at the very least, working up a comeback, but all he could manage while staring into those avocado green eyes, was wondering how even her irate voice sounded like angels singing.

 "Quit staring, weirdo," she said.

 That's when he noticed it wasn't just that her fists were clenched, but that one of them held the apple and now softball queen Angelina was winding up for a tie-breaking pitch to his nose.

Friday, April 1, 2016

A To Z: Short Beginnings A

2016 THEME: Short Stories - at least the beginnings thereof.
YOUR PART: Throw out names, themes, random words or situations using the letter of the day and I'll pick some of them to include in the opening paragraphs of a short story.
WHY: I'm most inspired when there's a challenge involved. Usually that means an opening line or a theme. This month: your words.

My creative blender awaits your A word suggestions in the comments section. Stop by tomorrow's post to read the story you inspired.

Looking for more great blogs? Check out the massive list of A to Z Challenge participants.